I SO woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. It wasn’t even 7 in the morning and I already felt like spitting nails. I don’t get it. I went to bed in a great mood, but woke up with my mind absolutely racing. And then I couldn’t stop thinking. About everything and nothing. And for some reason, in the middle of all this, I could start to feel my blood boiling.
And now, of course, EVERYTHING is a big deal: my earphones were all fucked up this morning, so that was the end of the world. I apologized for bumping into a guy on the subway this morning (not my fault, but whatever), and he evil-eyed me and said nothing. I GOT EVIL-EYED BY A FULL GROWN MAN. And then he had the audacity to steal my seat. Oh dude, if you only knew what you are messing with today.
Anyhow, last night I was sitting outside having a drink with the geriatric crowd at my apartment building (they started it!), talking about colonoscopies (I kid you not), when suddenly Roxy came over, put her two front paws on my lap and dug her head between my arm and my side. I was rubbing her head, when she looked up at me with those big brown eyes and it hit me like a thunderbolt.
After a whole year, I finally realized that I was responsible for another life.
I know, I know – it’s not a ‘human’ life. But it IS a life. And I am responsible for it.
She comes to me for cover during thunderstorms. She curls up on my lap when she is sick (and pukes on me). She lets me know that she’s tired and is going to bed by coming over, leaning on me, and licking my hand. She loudly rattles and licks her empty food dish to let me know that she is STILL FUCKING HUNGRY!
I finally understand how much she depends on me – and I on her.
I’m her mama. And she’s my sweet girl.
And now, of course, EVERYTHING is a big deal: my earphones were all fucked up this morning, so that was the end of the world. I apologized for bumping into a guy on the subway this morning (not my fault, but whatever), and he evil-eyed me and said nothing. I GOT EVIL-EYED BY A FULL GROWN MAN. And then he had the audacity to steal my seat. Oh dude, if you only knew what you are messing with today.
Anyhow, last night I was sitting outside having a drink with the geriatric crowd at my apartment building (they started it!), talking about colonoscopies (I kid you not), when suddenly Roxy came over, put her two front paws on my lap and dug her head between my arm and my side. I was rubbing her head, when she looked up at me with those big brown eyes and it hit me like a thunderbolt.
After a whole year, I finally realized that I was responsible for another life.
I know, I know – it’s not a ‘human’ life. But it IS a life. And I am responsible for it.
She comes to me for cover during thunderstorms. She curls up on my lap when she is sick (and pukes on me). She lets me know that she’s tired and is going to bed by coming over, leaning on me, and licking my hand. She loudly rattles and licks her empty food dish to let me know that she is STILL FUCKING HUNGRY!
I finally understand how much she depends on me – and I on her.
I’m her mama. And she’s my sweet girl.
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