The Temp

Well Holy Cow. Welcome to the great white north.

I'm far enough away from Toronto that Santa is my neighbour. And he lives a few doors down from the guy with the little truck with big wheels whose licence plate reads "Mudster". It's parked right beside his hot yellow sportscar.

Mee-oow.

My dad and I drove up north this past Friday after a food-filled visit with my sister and her husband. I think I gained 15 pounds in 3 days. So. Worth. It.

We are 30 minutes away from our destination when I say:

Me: So, not a lot of snow up here, eh dad?

Dad: Nope.

I swear to God I looked down, looked up...and there was FUCKING SNOW EVERYWHERE.

Dad: There's snow here, though.

It was as if someone actually drew a line and said "You know, I think I'm gonna make it snow right abooouuutt....here." And there it was.

Roxy is in doggy heaven, running around and rolling in the snow every chance she gets, while my mother and I tentatively tiptoe around each other, trying our best to make this temporary living situation work.

Read carefully: TEMPORARY LIVING SITUATION.

We've all had to make adjustments, especially since I have basically come and inserted myself into my mom's daily routine. And I understand routines. I hate having mine disrupted, and this is a huge disruption for both of us. But, we are both adults, and we will make this work. In her trailer. TEMPORARILY.

(If you can't get a hold of me, please come to the trailer and look for a freshly dug mound of dirt. I am likely dead under there.)

Even the dogs have a TEMPORARY understanding. My mom's dog has the run of the whole place, except for my TEMPORARY bedroom. That is Roxy's domain, and she is in control of it.

TEMPORARILY. ...although as I write this, her dog is fast asleep on my bed and Roxy is trying to jump on my lap. Hmmm...maybe we need to discuss this more.

The biggest adjustment: The Bed.

My poor Queen size bed is in storage, and I am sleeping on a single bed. A SINGLE BED! It's like a kick to the nuts. "Dude. You are single and therefore you will sleep in a single bed." Talk about tits to the wall.

Roxy has not figured this bed thing out yet, even after I have tried to kick her off and get her to sleep on the floor. She is so out of sorts that she's been sticking to me like glue when I'm home. Hence the getting-up-on-the-lap thing.

So, yeah. Temporarily disloged and displaced. But...the air is clean. Traffic is non-existent. I spent Saturday with my brother and my niece. I've met up with old, dear friends. And my mommy made my lunch today.

Life is good. It is very, very good.

TEMPORARILY.